Fight of “protective mothers” against incest of their ex-companions

Denoving the insufficient consideration of the charges of their children, they refuse to entrust them to their fathers, thus putting out the law. Some go so far as to lose custody. Many have agreed to testify.

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“Can you remind me more about Thursday? Because tomorrow at 7 o’clock I will be placed in custody …” The first exchange by SMS with Valérie sets the tone. When this mother of the Sarthe family (the women who testify, currently in procedure, required anonymity) entrust us, a few days later, his story by phone, she prefers to smile. “The first guard, I did not lead wide. By force, we get used.” This is the third time she spends several hours at the commune office, because of the complaints filed by his ex -Mari for “child non-representation”. Since one of his daughters accused his father at the age of 3 years of having “touched his Zouzou” (the term means his intimate parts), she refuses to entrust her, putting himself in illegality and causing this response.

The story of Valérie is of course singular, with its peculiarities and its own family dynamics. But it echoes many narratives collected by Le Monde in recent months, emanating from mothers who have lost confidence in institutions after accusations of incest formulated by their children against their father, who turn against them. The similarities between these files call, to the point that the independent commission on the incest and the sexual violence against children (Ciivice), which makes, Thursday, March 31, its intermediate recommendations, had already published a first opinion, on October 27, 2021 , sake the fate of these “protective mothers” come in number testify to her.

Let’s go back to Valérie. After five years of union, it separates in 2018 from the Father of his first two daughters, then 3 years old and 18 months old. Okay, an alternating operation is then put in place, despite the difficulty of which his ex-spouse testifies to accept the separation. “He followed me, was harassing me, made me blackmail. I said that it was going to pass.” The nanny who keeps his youngest girl alerts several times on “big negligence at the level of body care when she is with dad “. She also challenges her about the change of behavior of her eldest daughter, which she knows well and keeps regularly. “She who was so jovial had become any tristounette,” says Valérie, who initially puts this change of mood on the account of the separation.

“presumption of lie”

A few months later, in full shower, the eldest daughter cowards: “Dad gives me tapes at the zouzou”, miming the gesture. “The arms fall away,” remembers Valérie three and a half years later. The next day she goes to the gendarmerie to file a complaint. “I do not put my daughter back to his father, under false pretexts, waiting for his audition”, which is slow to come. “My daughter continued talking at home, I needed a third party, so I used a children’s psychologist.” Who confirms that his daughter is very scared, and that she ” words “unequivocal on what happened to him. “She told him that it had happened to her because they sleep in the bed with their father, but that his sister has layers.”

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/Media reports.